"La Vie En Rose"

This line strikes magic in me, every single time I hear it.
Translation?
" Life through rose-colored glasses."

There's a certain special feeling when you trust in things even if you know they're going to completely and utterly destroy you in the end because you absolutely do not see the outcomes in what-will-be, oh no! You always look for the outcomes in simple what-could-be instead, defying logic and history.
But I must tell you, life through rose colored glasses is beautiful, even death wears pink-colored robes!
But the worst part? Red flags look like any other flags.

Then,

you

sink. 

Yet, the water is pink. 

You

can't

breathe.

Yet, everything is mystical, colored in the loveliest shades of rose.

(-Drowning in an ocean of pink.)

Excerpt From the Diary of an Optimist (Prologue)

I am a very happy person- always looking at the bright side of things. I am a person who is always optimistic, giving more of herself than she can ever hope to gain.
But nonetheless, I carry on. I love being this way because it made me who I am and it will make me who I am meant to be. So, I do not fret. Stumbling, I will find my way. But then again, there are times when I can't be happy, when I stop everything that I'm thinking and allow myself to breathe in the moment, look around and be selfish. Times like these, I will only think about me, what I have done and what I can do; every little detail.
Because sometimes, it's completely okay to feel sad, it's okay to break down and feel the pain. I trace the scars on me, all the writings on my body and let things be; neither moving forward nor letting them go back.
And a day will come, soon, I am sure of it, when I will look back on everything that I have done and not feel lost. I know freedom is a very abstract term that is relative to every single being but on that day, I will truly be free. From that day onward, I wouldn't even have to hide the marks on my arms nor paint colors to alter my skin. I will be able to love each and every fragment of my universe and be proud of who I am.

I will, finally, be who I was always meant to be.

Signed,
Just a Girl

HOME; Where the Heart is

The five petaled daisy blew slightly in the wind. Leaning towards the light yellow grass, it looked on sadly, everywhere, searching for green, even a slight hint of it would do.
    Green was loving, green was healing.
    She wanted love, she wanted to heal.
The daisy blew harder and tore off its five petals in different directions, just to follow her heart and find green. The first petal died, so did the second one and so did the third, the fourth was stuck on a man who was a traveled and the fifth flew aimlessly in the wind.

Sensing a petal on his shoulder, the man questioned, "Where, oh where, little petal, where do you wish to fly?"
    The little petal answered, "I do not know yet, sir, but I do know of what I seek." Amused, the man asked again, "So pray tell me, what do you wish to seek?" To which the petal replied, "I come from a huge world of yellow, sir, but I know, that is not what I am meant for. So, I seek green; I seek the magical color which can heal and give life."
The man sadly nodded, "I understand, I understand well. Green was what I searched for too, once upon a time. They used to tell me, the grass is greener on the other side of the fence and the realized, what they said was true- the grass is greener on the other side of the fence but I still wasn't satisfied so I traveled on, and went over the fence, on and on, again and again, and the grass went on becoming greener and greener until one day, I stumbled upon purple! I was perplexed but I realized that maybe, just maybe, that was all I was ever searching for. So, I ended my travels and settled down but alas! my dear little petal, my happiness was not meant to be with purple. We were two matching pieces of different puzzles. I had to leave, I tried going back but I cannot find my way; I am alone and lost. Will you be my companion, darling petal?" But as his story ended, the man realize that the petal had died, leaving nothing but a faint trace of fairy dust, marking the place where she once was.
          
                                                The man was sad, but he moved on.

Meanwhile, there came a time when the fifth petal lost hope. She had been blowing aimlessly for more time than she thought was possible for her, so she stopped and lay down, her body aching with sadness and desire. Then she closed her eyes, for what she felt would be her last time.
With one final, weak try, she opened her eyes and looked around, she had reached a vast field of a color so exquisite that she held her breath, staring in awe. She looked up at the sun, the rays were a brilliant shade of green; and the grass? Purple- and not just any purple, it was the loveliest of violet. It was simply magic.
     She had found it at last- that one place where her soul was at peace. She would be healed, and she would be loved.
                                                         She was home, at last.

An Ode to my Best Friend

You start out as a sapling- a tiny thing so eager to grow.
You cherish the nourishment you’re offered; and you grow and grow and grow.
In time, when they cut you down, you think, “No, this is a mistake. They want me to grow.”
So, you start out again, but this time,
slowly morphing your hands to shelter your head from the onslaught of words that you never thought could hurt,
words you always thought to be pretty;
trodden with footsteps filled with so much memories.
They cut you down again but you, with your naïve eyes and believing smile still have faith that whatever they did was right, offering no directions of your own, whatsoever.
And they cut you down again, thrice, four times, five times and then, there comes a moment in your life when you realize, you don’t need to grow according to them.
You don’t need to have the prettiest flower or the greenest leaves because you realize, they’re going to cut you down no matter what.
Then, that is the moment when you truly grow, no, not with the prettiest flower or the greenest leaves no, but you grow to the direction you’ve always wanted to grow to; defying their logic of right and growing a slightly bit to the left.

Because, love, the path to the light is not a straight one, it is tricky, twisted and bent and people will find it ugly, they will find it ridiculous. But grow, grow twisted, grow bent, grow a little to the left, finding your own directions because these ‘flaws’ will be the ones to lead you to the light.

(3am thoughts)

Superheroes

I am a paradox, a living anomaly. A little bit of sunshine mixed with hurricane, I am a patchwork of not only

black and white, but the whole damn rainbow, with extra sprinkles.

I am a warrior, a fighter who has dreamt of worlds both lost and unknown, one who has loved too much and too little at the same time, I was born to tear down the worlds, to unearth the universe that hides underneath and graffiti the fabric of reality with doodles of flowers and swirling lines. I absolutely refuse to be simplified with labels.

I see the world a little differently than you do, my concept of beauty is as unorthodox as it can get. I find flaws alluring; I see magic radiating from the broken pieces of your existence. I admire the struggle it takes to be a human, the strength we need to simply get out of bed on days when anxiety grips us and depression knocks on our door.

And oh how I dare, my love! How I dare to feel invincible; as strong as a diamond, yet as fragile as glass. How I dare to feel infinite, extend my wings and fly across the starry skies as I outstretch my arms, cigarette in one hand and a finger raised in another as a tribute to gender stereotypes.

I am strong today, because I chose to put down the blade and tilt my head, trying to shift my perspective of life.

I chose to save myself, to cling onto the lightest strand of darkness and climb out of the darkest abyss of my own mind.

I chose to love myself with such intensity that I tell you, the stars and the moon shit themselves with jealousy.

I am indestructible today, my darling, all because I chose.
I chose to be my superhero, today and forevermore.